RUNNING RIOT

There was a time when the only adults you saw running were those chasing after a Routemaster bus with the intention of leaping onto the rear platform, then catching their breath while delving into their pocket to give their fare to the expectant conductor. Or alternatively, if you saw adults running it was generally associated with a fracas of some sort.

We now have parks, open spaces and pavements to use for our daily exercise while the current lockdown inexorably marches on. A brisk walk or a leisurely stroll  does wonders for one's mental health as well as general health and a visit to the park, heath or field is particularly invigorating, involving as it does, a bit of nature and fresh air.

However there is one group of people that interfere with headspace, disrupt quiet time, interfere with tranquility and barge into benign thought. That group are runners.

I'm not talking about joggers, those that calmly pass by at a non intimidating pace, I'm talking about runners. 

They hurtle towards the pedestrian at breakneck speed, gasping and spluttering with furrowed eyebrow and glare of eyes. Their expectation that the walker, who has the audacity to not be doing an impression of Usain Bolt, leap aside to give right of way.

The runner has the pompous air of superiority and lack of awareness of personal space of a Russian oligarch on a shopping spree in Harvey Nicholls.

The Runner, you see, is focussed, so focussed that children, the aged and those with hot drinks are merely obstacles standing in the way of their pursuit of perfection.

They don't need to use the footpath if they want to beat their personal bests over 200 metres, after all, surely it's better for them not to have to confront elderly couples enjoying some fresh air when they are in the zone. It feels like wilful confrontation and can of course lead to the most unmellowing of mellows.

Run if you like, run as fast as you can, but do it where there is space, and there is so much empty space to race in London without imposing your whirling olympian limbs on an unsuspecting public out and about.

If the pedestrian world was a road users world the runner would be a cross between a Gold Range Rover Sport owner and a White Van Driver.