iPhone headphones-no one wants to hear a swarm of wasps banging dustbin lids in
synchronicity thank you
“Can I get”-It’s”
may I have”, “can I have” you’re not ‘getting’ anything
Fake-fake
nails, fake eyebrows, fake hair, fake tan, fake breasts, fake brands, where’s
it going to stop?
D replacing TH- people corrupting speech with the letter D? dey do don’t dey?
Bus drivers-the
antagonistic manic depressives of the road
Celebrities-oh
right, so you’ve been on one of the hundreds of TV stations inhaling oxygen and
exhaling carbon dioxide for more than seven minutes: welcome to the world of
celebrity
Like – “So
yeah, he was like, and then she was like, then we were like, and then like,
they like, etc
Comic Sans – Use this to gain instant lack of credibility
Village- calling an area such & such Village does not
create instant affluence
Children's Sun Suits- just put some sun cream on them and give sensible
boundaries, or just don't go on a holiday in the sun
Gordon Ramsey - okay we get it, you’re the shouty sweary chef; you
shout and swear at people
Weatherspoons -Alcoholics 'R' us. Cathedrals of crushing despair
Low strung trousers- march of the Penguins
Ryanair-you're not passengers you're money sponges now sit down, shut up and spend and whatever you do don't try to contact us
Crocs-medical staff and children only. Adults need not apply
ITV2-A bandon all hope ye who would enter expecting anything other than a televisual equivalent of a mobile above a cot
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having said that;